Posted by: turtlebella | 8 September 2006

My Autobiography

Saw this at Ink and IncapabilityFill this out in your own words and repost as, “My autobiography.”

1.Where did you take or get your profile picture?
I don’t have a profile picture. I have a gravatar picture that shows up when I make comments on haloscan. I took it in Portugal. It’s the underside of an Umbelliferae inflorescence. I know the family name for Umbelliferae has changed like a decade or more ago but I can’t be arsed* to learn the new name.

2.What exactly are you wearing right now?
Jeans, my favorite clogs, a lingerie-y, bright orange camisole, a scarf with muted orange, beige, blue colors.

3.What is your current problem?
My lack of motivation at work to get anything done. I’m just bored. Trying to figure out how not to be bored.

4.What makes you most happy?
Hanging out with the sqvirrel and my friends and family, drinking some beer or eating. Good if there is a dog or three of ours about too.

5.What’s the name of the song that you’re listening to?
You’ve Been A Friend (Jesus & Mary Chain)

6.Has anyone you’ve been really close with passed away?
Yes. My dad died when I was 14. It was hell.

7.Do you ever watch MTV?
No No No. As far as I can tell they never have any actual videos anymore, which was the only reason I watched it before. Actually, haven’t even clicked on the station in the last, oh, six years.

8.What’s something that really annoys you?
George Bush/Dick Cheney/Donald Rumsfeld etc.

Chapter 1:All About You

1.Middle name:

Based on turtle or my real first name.

3.Current location:
College town in the Midwest.

4.Eye color:

Chapter 2:Family

1.Do you live with your parents:

2.Do you get along with your parent(s):

3.Are your parents married/separated/divorced
My mom was a widow, remarried and then got divorced.

4.Do you have any Siblings?:
I have one full brother (Bear), three half-sisters, one half-brother. I used to have three step-brothers and two half-sisters, but our parents split up (see above). One of these (Bird) I still consider a sister. She introduced her five year old to my mom as his “ex-step-grandmother, it was quite hilarious!

Chapter 3: favorite…

1. Ice Cream:
Baskin Robbins’ Peanut Butter & Chocolate but can’t buy that since no BR here. So buy Haagen Dasz Butter Pecan, but only when on sale.


I have no idea. People have favorite shampoo? Whatever the one is that I’m using now is good, can’t remember the name…

Chapter 4: Do You..

1.Dance in the shower:
Not without killing myself! It’s slippery in there. Perhaps this was meant to be Sing in the shower. In which case the answer is no.

2.Write on your hand:
No. Unless I have absolutely no where else to write something vitally important down.

3.Call people back:
Yes. Although in general I dislike making phone calls.

4.Believe in love:

5.Sleep on a certain side of the bed
Yes, the left side. But before I had to choose a side (i.e., started sleeping with someone regularly) I didn’t really care.

6. Any bad habits:
Cracking my knuckles. Cannot stop if my life depends upon it.

7. Any mental health issues?
Um, hello? This is 2006 in the United States of America! Who doesn’t have mental health issues? Unless your British and in the USA, in which case you’re just in denial.

Chapter 5: Have You…

1.Broken a bone:
Yes, two. My brother dumped me out of the bucket of a tractor when I was three or so. I broke my collar bone. And when I was eleven I broke my ankle pushing my cousin on a swing. Hmmm, perhaps my relatives are dangerous to my bone health!

2.Sprained stuff:
My left ankle, too many times to count.

3.Had physical therapy?:
Yes, after ankle broke. And once for my jaw to get mobility back after jaw surgery. That was a joy (not).

4.Gotten stitches:
Yes, at age four I sliced open the edge of my eyebrow on the corner of a table when my dad pushed me into a chair next to the table. Poor guy, my mom was in Mexico and he was trying to get my brother and I to stop running around the whole house like the wild kids we were. He felt really bad about it and I got an ice cream cone and got to pick out any toy I wanted from the toy store. I think I got a deal!

5.Taken Pain killers?
Yes, after breaking ankle and after the jaw surgery.

6.Gone SCUBA diving or snorkeling:
Yes. Growing up near the beach (California) we snorkeled some. And then when I was sixteen I begged for SCUBA lessons and got them. But once I left Cali that was the end of that (and also it’s expensive. Once my parents weren’t paying…no more SCUBA! Funny how that works).

7.Been stung by a bee:

8.Thrown up at the dentist:

9.Sworn in front of your parents:
When I was in 5th grade I said “That royally sucks” in front of Mami Deer. I got in BIG trouble although she wouldn’t explain what “sucks” meant. Now I swear a little more in front of her but then again, she swears more in front of me too. If I go overboard she generally says,“Turtlebella! In front of your mother!” in a mildly shocked tone.

10.Had detention:
No. I was a very, very good girl.

11.Been sent to the principal’s office:
Heaven’s no. As I said, I was really good!

12.Been called a ho?
No. Once someone called me a c*nt. I punched him. He had it coming, the git.

Chapter 6: Who/What was the last

Little Miss Sunshine. Brilliant. SO funny.

2.Person to text you:
Um, no one texts me, I don’t text anyone. Call me a Luddite!

3.Person you called:
The sqvirrel.

4.Person you hugged:
The sqvirrel.

5.Person you tackled?
I don’t really tackle people as a normal course of action. I believe I did tackle college boyfriend to prove that women could play football. I took that boy DOWN. Nevermind that he was a good five inches shorter than me…

6.Thing you touched:
Well, the computer I’m typing on? Before that? Probably my scarf. It’s very very soft.

7.Thing you ate:
Sha Sha Mo Mo (Tibetan chicken dumplings).

8.Thing you drank:

9.Thing you said:
See you tonight! (To a friend who I will see at a reading tonight by Kos of the Daily Kos).

10.Friend you miss the most that has moved:
I’m always moving too. And so most of the friends I have live elsewhere and it’s hard to choose one. Batgirl has moved the farthest (back to her native England), so I’ll pick her.

*a wonderful British expression I should use more.



  1. Can’t be arsed is a truly beautiful expression. So too is “he deserved it the git”, that’s really tickled me!

  2. You’re a luddite. I don’t text either. In fact, I just barely bought a cell. :)

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